We'll PRETEND That There Are Missiles.

Two Royal Navy destroyers could not fire their missiles if they came under attack - because they have been removed to save cash.

Type 42s HMS Exeter and HMS Southampton have been working without their Sea Dart guided missile system since Christmas, it was revealed today.

To go with the cutbacks, at least half a dozen operating crew have been transferred to other ships.

The missiles, used to protect the destroyers and larger aircraft carriers against air attack, have been stored away even though HMS Exeter has sailed to the Mediterranean twice and joined a NATO-led operation in that time.

CO to XO: Right. When I say "Fire!" I want you make missile-firing noises. Swoosh! Swoosh! Like that, get it?
XO to CO:You're not seri--er, um. Aye, Aye, sir. Swoosh it is.


Gelded