Men: Are You A Chimpanzee Or a Bonobo?

A scientific study indicates that these two primate species react to stress in different ways.

In stress situations the chimpanzees showed increased production of testosterone, and were more likely to fight and use violence; the bonobos, on the other hand, showed increased production of cortisol, also known as "cuddle compound." Bonobos are also often referred to as "peace and love" apes.

So basically the apes divide on ideological lines, with aggressive redneck chimpanzees resorting to violence, and peaceful hippie bonobos sitting down for a cuddle and Kumbaya sing-along.

I think I'll risk being called racist and observe that we appear to have a bonobo in the White House...