It Was One Of Them Assault Cigarettes

She stuck a lit cigarette in a woman's eye in self-defense, she claims.

Ford said three women, including the one she’d previously had a dispute with inside, then attacked her outside the bar.

“By this time, I’m about to suffocate,” Ford said. “They’re wailing on my head.”

Ford said she burned one of the women with a cigarette in an attempt to stop a beating.

“I didn’t mean to hurt her, but I wanted to make her stop,” Ford said.


What I want to know is, was the cigarette from one of those high-capacity 20-cigarette packs? We can't have people going around with the possibility of burning 20 eyes in a single attack, now can we? We need to restrict cigarette packs to a more reasonable number, like, say, 1 or 2. Or hell, ban them outright. Cigarettes ain't mentioned in the Constitution, so no one should have the right to keep and bear cigarettes. Save people's eyes, ban cigarettes!

FOR THE CHILDREN!