John Lilyea over at This Ain't Hell brings it regarding the Usual Suspects working overtime in Chicago:
General Allen called to tell us that those shootings happened because of Ramadan and the resulting Eid al-Fitr celebration, despite the fact that probably none of the victims or shooters are Muslims. Allen went on to say that folks in Chicago need to drink more water to prevent further shootings. Sgt. Maj. of the Army Raymond F. Chandler III could be heard in the background blaming tattoos for the shootings.
Afghan President Hamad Karzai emailed to tell us that it was probably because of Canadian intelligence officers who have been infiltrating Chicago.
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