Headline of the Day

"COLOMBIAN WOMAN PLANTS POTATO IN HER VAGINA AS A CONTRACEPTIVE."

Medical staff at a central Colombian hospital were shocked after they found a potato wedged in the vagina of a 22-year-old woman, according to Cosmopolitan.

The girl reportedly sought medical attention due to severe abdominal pain. She was given a pelvic exam and a nurse discovered a germinated potato with roots growing inside of her uterus.

Apparently, her mother advised her to use the spud as birth control. "My mom told me that if I didn't want to get pregnant, I should put a potato up there, and I believed her," said the unidentified patient.

Gee, thanks, Mom.

Captain Kirk Will Have the Blue One, Of Course

Some mother brought vagina-shaped cookies to school for the li'l chirrens to eat:

"Which one do you want, Li'l Johnny?"

"Fire Crotch!"

"Of course you do. How silly of me to ask."

Now Witness the Firepower of This Fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL Vajayjay!

"Can 'vagina weightlifting' give you better sex? Expert claims hefting dumbbells with your privates will enhance your sex life... and make you the 'life of the party'"

Kim Anami unveils 'ten reasons to lift weights with your vagina' video

Says it can boost libido and help you become a world record holder

Anami is a sex coach and runs retreats

Tatyana Kozhevnikova, Russian gymnast who can lift a 14kg kettleball with private parts, officially has world's strongest vagina

Might come in handy if you're stuck in the sand driving at the beach...