Getting Past the Bridgekeeper

I'm the Bridgekeeper of the Bridge of Doom. To make it to election day, you have to get by me by answering three questions.


I'll go first! I'm a Suuuuupah-Geeeeeenius!


Fine. WHAT is your NAME?


Senator Joe Biden from Delaware.


WHAT is your PARTY?


I'm a Democrat!


WHAT is your favorite COLOR?


BLUE!


Right, off you go!


Piece 'o cake! So long, suckers!


YOU! What is YOUR name?


I'm Senator John McCain from Arizona.


WHAT is your PARTY?


I'm a Republican.


There's people who doubt that, but you caucus with the Republicans, so I'll let it slide. WHAT is the difference between a SUNNI and a SHIA Muslim?


Um...er...uh...I don't knowaiiiieeeeeee!


WHAT is YOUR name?


I'm Senator Barack Obama of Illinois.


WHAT is your PARTY?


I'm a Democrat.


WHAT is your favorite COLOR?


Blue.


Correct, off you go! And please accept this campaign contribution.


Thanks, Keith. You're sure to be Communications Director in an Obama administration, my man.


YOU! What is YOUR name?


I'm Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska.


What is your PARTY?


I'm a Republican.


Is the capital of Kentucky spelled L-E-W-I-S-V-I-L-L-E or L-O-U-I-S-V-I-L-L-E?


Is that a trick question? The capital of Kentucky is Frankfort!


Oh, crap, she knew the ansaiiieeeeeee!


That's what you get for trying to cheat. I guess I'll need a new running mate, poor John didn't make it. Fred, are you busy? Wanna be VP?


I'd be happy to, darlin'.


*sings* You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'.


*sings* You never even caaaaalll me by myyyyyy naaaaaame! Whooo!

h/t to Wuzzadem for the concept.