Chris Muir's Day By Day

Saturday, May 11, 2013

If You Bring a Lester Maddox Memorial Axe Handle To the Boy Scout Camping Trip...

...you might be a redneck:

Went on a Scout Camping trip with son's troop last night. Sleeping on the ground was bad enough but this morning we went trail bike riding and I am beat.

What has this got to do with "Drum Major?"

Well the boys trucked in fire wood to this state park that does not allow even foraging for wood and were attempting to build a fire using wood they had split a few weeks back with a machine splitter....the smallest chunks being maybe three pounds and a hand full. No tender.....no what we insensitive old farts called Squaw wood.

They attempted to light the fires by stuffing a teepee stack with paper. Several handfuls of useless white ash later I could stand it no more.

Nope, not one adult had brought an axe, hatchet, machete or Big Honking knife.

I took my old Spiderco Endura that some more long term folks might remember I broke the tip on pulling fence staple in an emergency and.....wait for it..... batoned myself a pile of splinters and thin strips and pencil sized bits. I used my Lester Maddox Memorial axe handle I keep in the back of the truck( lost my actual Pick mattock handle years back and found this axe handle) to drive the blade of the Spyderco through a few hunks of Oak.

Bad for knife or not bad, example for the boys or not, we had an actual fire with in two minutes of lighting my batoned wood with those big split pieces "involved."

Glad I knew how to do it and had experience at it or we would have had no smoores or shiskabob last night.


For you younger readers, Lester Maddox was the Governor of Georgia once upon a time, he was also a racist restaurant owner who, when the civil rights movement meant that blacks might enter his Pic-Rick Restaurant, threatened them with an axe handle. He later sold replicas of the axe handle in the restaurant gift shop.

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